As I'm headed out the door this morning for work, I get a call on my cell phone listed as "Restricted Number." I answered, thinking it might be my sub-letter calling with some news (apparently the hot water went out in my old Brighton Beach apartment, and my sub-letter waited 5 days to tell me... no, correction, YELL at me about it, even though I have absolutely nothing to do with day-to-day operation of the building).
Anyway, instead of that nonsense, I hear my ex and a young kid saying hello. One fuzzy connection drop and a call back to my land line later, she is asking me if my newest video is scary, as she's with a 3-year old child, presumably one of her friend's kids. I say, no, not really, and that pretty much is the end of the conversation.
I hate that. Its bad enough that when these kind of really abrupt breakups happen I'm left to think about the person every day for months afterwards. Why exacerbate the problem by calling about something so trivial? And to make it worse, she had that casual, friendly tone as though nothing had happened. I get it, she moved on, INSTANTANEOUSLY, there's no need to rub it in.
And of course, to further torture myself, I check her MySpace page to find that she's finally removed me from her Top 8. I'm not sure what is worse, knowing that all her talk of spending a life together with me was a lie, or the fact that I frakkin' care about MySpace Top 8's. I used to make fun of that sort of thing, and now I actually give a damn? FRRAAAKKKK!!!!
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It's so irritating to love someone that you think you could love for a life time and then they treat you like it never happened when you break up. It's so difficult for me to love because (eventually when I do fall in love) I love hard and believe in giving a person my all and not just the part I want to give him, which is something people tend to do. People don't treat relationships and marriage the way they use too. It seems so taboo to be able to find a long-lasting (20, 30 years or more) type of relationship in this day and age, or better yet in our generation. So my advice to you is to lick your wounds, sulk for only a moment if you have to then pick yourself up and move on. Don't give her power over you. For some strange reason women like that kind of power (don't ask me why I'm a girl and i don't know). If she is out of your life then it is for good reason! Let her go........
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