Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Stupid Heartbreak and Sickness!

If you don't know or haven't been able to gather, I broke up with my girlfriend of 2+ years last week. Long story, not going to talk about the why of it all right now.

What I will talk about is how I allow my emotions to get in the way of my creativity and productivity. I'd been planning, for months, to shoot a video for Elvis' birthday on January 8th. Nothing complicated, just a simple little karaoke thing with a wig, just for fun because I happen to like Elvis and I've had one of his songs stuck in my head for months. And I forgot. I just plain forgot... because my mind, soul and body are so depressed at the moment over that breakup.

And this has happened for years. I allow my relationship drama to paralyze me, to stall me from being productive, creative and healthy. It's a pretty awful pattern. Seeking the love from others I don't seem to give to myself. I'm not sure I know how to break the cycle other than just one small step at a time.

But that first step... man...


Beth said...

You're not alone in that. Good luck. Small steps.

Chef Z said...

When it comes to life, it's not so much the size of the step you are taking, as the direction.
Best of luck to you. We're all rooting for you and excited to see where your steps take you. :-)

Tanya VS said...

Hang in there Spidey. You'll pop back up on the other side when Spring comes around. Mark my words.