Tuesday, April 3, 2007

The Vista-Dell Monologues OR "Why I'm about to switch..."

They're not Widgets. They're GADGETS! See? Completely different from Mac Widgets!

You want to connect to an Airport Enabled Wireless Network? What's your password? Yeah? Great... you can't use that. Spend 2 hours finding the hex enabled WEP, THIRTY TWO character password. Yeah. Good. Have fun!

What's that new Dell purchaser? You hate glossy screens? Well, we're not going to make ANY mention of this in the purchasing specs, but your new screen? GLOSSY!!!

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You know what just frakkin' crashed?

The screensaver.

THE F&%#ING SCREENSAVER CRASHED!

And because it crashed, NOTHING appeared on the screen, so I had to shut off the computer. I couldn't even shutdown programs properly or save.

THANK YOU VISTA!

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Okay, new rule. In any given week, your computer should not crash more times than you're having sex.

So far my machine is beating the pants off me.

Vista SUUUCCCCKKKS! I have had computer VIRUSES that are less annoying than Vista.

Hey, and I know AOL sucks and everything, but the fact of the matter is it's been around for almost TWO DECADES and is one of the most common pieces of software around. If your operating system can't run a new and clean install of AOL without crashing every 45 minutes, maybe that's a PROBLEM.

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Ah, more gems. The computer just restarted all on it's own. You know why? I PLUGGED IT IN. Yes, that's right. The battery was running low, so I plugged it in and... RESTART!

Also...

Sound Recorder in Vista now ONLY saves to WMA files and not Wavs.

Of course, that is moot, because the Dell Inspiron 1505 I bought DOESN'T HAVE A BUILT IN MICROPHONE!

You know what it DOES have though...?

A return policy.

Time to get a Macbook Pro.